French Lick Resort Judicial Conference – Even Judges Cry

I just had the honor to speak at the closing session of the annual Indiana State Judicial Conference in French Lick, IN at the historic French Lick Resort. There were almost 500 judges in the room from across the state of Indiana including the Indiana Supreme Court. For a man who grew up in a tiny home in the middle of northern Indiana cornfields, it was quite a sight. Of course, I held back nothing! 🙂

The title of my talk was “The Power of Words”. I was not only able to share my story of overcoming severe trauma and adversity, I had the privilege to teach a bit about my life skills program, The Ladder UPP. For most people, when they are standing in front of a judge it is one of the most nerve racking, traumatic moments in their life. It is a liminal point that will determine the trajectory of all their next steps. The best judges use this moment to project words that will hopefully provide perspective and hope that whatever happens next, it can be a launching pad to change.

I shared with the Judges how I had been working with a lot of recently incarcerated men and women and those with the best attitudes almost universally had something good to say about a Judge. In those moments when their fate was being decided, there was always some reassurance, “this doesn’t have to be the end. It can be the beginning of something. I believe in you.” Words like these can help you sleep and wake up believing you are one day closer to a new life. It is hope. Those are the power of words.

I was especially encouraged by many of the Juvenile Court Judges I met. What sincere, passionate people. For the ones I spoke with, they truly saw themselves on a mission, but a very, very, tough mission. When a child doesn’t have a family, a good mother and father, and they are surrounded by dysfunction, they might not understand the most fundamental concepts of right and wrong, setting goals, working hard, and taking advantage of opportunity. They don’t understand “hope”. It made my day when some of these judges explained to me how The Ladder UPP concepts would help them and since that time many have contacted me to incorporate the workbook into their court’s programming. What a blessing.

I’m so proud of Indiana, my home state. We are on the cutting edge of establishing veteran courts, helping veterans who have fallen through the cracks and didn’t get a healthy transition from military service a chance to succeed. One judge in particular told me about his experience with veteran’s courts and took home my workbook, book, and CD. A couple of days later he e-mailed asking for more copies as he had already given his to a veteran. These judges really do care! And he asked for everything to be autographed, by my wife!!!! What a beautiful saint she is, I love it when she can attend my events and see what I do. That epic motorcycle trip we took together, and the 8 children she raises and homeschools, are powerful images of living your life the way you dream.

I reminded the judges that we all get broken, even them. In fact, when you are judge, a police officer, a Marine, you name it, the label can keep us from getting help. The fear of losing that label or getting another one, can keep our demons in the dark and make them worse. It is no way to live. Whenever I speak, I always have the advantage of seeing the faces of the audience, and the truth of my words seen in those faces. We all get broken.

After my talk, when most of the judges had left for the final training, I was approached by a long time Judge in the hallway. It was just him and me, and he wasted no time. No small talk.

“Thank you Silouan. I want you to know that whenever you talk, there is at least one person in that room who is broken and needs to hear your wisdom. I was that guy today. You helped me like you’ll never know, and I’m gonna get help. God bless you.” He hugged me and left.

Even judges cry. We all get broken. For the love of God, look out for each other folks. We have one life, live free!