Will I Be Bullied and Beaten Forever? Changing Lives With Love

Bullied and beaten, so sad and so many. We have a responsibility to respond.

Recently, I spoke to a group of students at a rural Indiana High School at the invitation of their teacher who had attended one of my Ladder UPP workshops.

They came from a criminal justice and two health classes, and the original intent was to talk mostly about PTSD. Scanning their faces as I was about to begin, I knew a slight change of plans was in order. They brought me back to my High School years and all of sudden words I wish I had known then rushed into my head – words it had taken a lot of false steps and bruises to discover.

Surrounded in a sea of spirits looking for direction, we can feel so alone as we make our way to discover who we are. A current of secrets and not-so-secrets fill the stream of any High School hallway, the kind that drive stakes through hearts and make limitless futures seem very limited – bullied and beaten, talked down to and abused, overcome by poverty and the evils of life that consume youth. With the time I was given, I used a few minutes to talk about some of the bad things that can happen to us when we are young that shape our lives and impact our future. These adversities usually leave us with a choice, use them as fuel to make life a wonderful adventure, or use them as an excuse to exist and be carried along by circumstance.

Now, they were High School kids, so not everyone was on the edge of their seats, but they all seemed to be listening and as I talked frankly about bullying, broken homes, rape, poverty, violence, failures, loss and all the things that keep kids from being kids, it was obvious some chords were being played in their hearts. We are not alone, we all have pain, use this pain to discover what is most important to you and follow it. Look out for each other.

I did my best to show them the power of love and the possibilities of truth. When I was finished, even though I was running late and they had more classes, time still allowed for some hugs, from HIGH SCHOOL kids, and that gave me even more hope that some of what I said had been helpful. I wouldn’t know the full extent until a couple of weeks later.

They arrived in a large manilla envelope dropped off at my house by their teacher. Someone much more creative than myself had spelled Silouan Green across the front in large colorful letters. Inside was a sacred treasure, letters from the students. Many were just standard, teacher made me do it, thank you notes, but a large number were incredibly poignant and heartfelt. It was obvious that most of them had never had anyone talk to them about life in this way. Some were heartbreaking – short tales of rape, suicide, bullying – ending with something like, “I didn’t feel so alone after your talk and it gave me hope. You helped me see that just because my life has been this way it doesn’t have to keep being this way. I want to live.” They were so brave. Especially a couple that I won’t give details about. Just please, pray for them, these brave young souls.

Another came from a different side of the spectrum. He was not one of those picked on, bullied, and abused. He was just someone who steered clear of them. The talk helped him see the life behind the label that we so easily give people and define them by. He related how after class that day he saw a girl who no one ever talked to. One of those souls lost in the stream. He smiled at her and said hello. She smiled back. He said it make him feel good inside.

It is so simple to care for each other, yet we make it so hard.

You want to know how you change the world? One smile, one person at a time. One hug, one hand shake, one conversation, one unexpected friendship. Love each other, and lives change – theirs and ours.